Routines and Relationships...

1/26/2016

Not sure where I was going with this but I seemed to have come up with a double R thing for a title. That's what is going on with my life and I must feel the need to talk about it. Lucky you guys!! Lol

I started my new job and it's going well and a major learning curve. I like it but with all new things comes the brain overload, figuring out the best route there, planning workouts in and the ever so challenging soccer schedule my awesome son has. Don't get me wrong I love it all but will be better once I can fall into that routine. Once I have that then on weekends or free nights I can do my spontaneous stuff and random day trips that I so love to do. I miss having that balance. I am missing my consistent workouts. Getting up early has it challenges. Would be better if I could get to bed earlier at night and that is a goal I am working on. Working on my healthy eating and drinking enough water too. Everyday I get better at one piece of the puzzle. Slowly and surely I will get there. Seeing weight loss again due to my changes and not letting stress control my life has sure been helping.

Relationships.... Well were do I begin. Let's just say this whole dating thing and now online dating stuff is interesting. We all have our own lives before we meet and it feels like some people expect you to drop everything and include them in. I am a 100% full time single mom trying to make everyone happy along with keeping myself sane in this process. I don't get free weekends or a week off and a week on. It's all me all the time. No breaks unless I make them. Trying to keep my 12yr old sane in this process and trying to not mess him up along the way so he can be a successful man in life and his own relationships. Helping him accomplish his dreams and his full time year round competitive soccer and now racing goals. Plus following my own dreams because I am not going to stop living and holding my dreams back. I had 14 yrs of not able to be myself and be my true self. Some people can't handle my true self which is OK with me. I don't need people to like me anymore. I don't like everyone either. I don't need to be saved, fixed and I am not a dumb fragile flower. I don't like to feel demoralized or made to feel bad about myself because I am not good enough for a person. I am very smart, strong and independent. I have a massive heart and will help anyone that needs it. I like to feel appreciated like everyone else. I am sarcastic and super honest. What's with guys breaking up thru a text message or just plain out not responding back to a text. I find that rude. Why can't we act like adults and respect one and another and pick up the phone or do it in person? Have we really lost what it's like to be an adult and respect others? If your thinking about it please don't. It's a cowardly way to end things... Least give the other person some respect and pick up the phone to explain things and talk like people do. Don't leave them hanging and not respond either. Again a cowardly way to be and your just making yourself look like an ass. I just want to be me and have someone be themselves and make new memories together. I don't need to be completed, I am already a complete person. I am looking for my best friend, who as a team we can accomplish so many cool things together.

My life is a busy one...I don't see my friends often enough. I race lots as well and train. I just want to be me and have someone appreciate me for me. I always do the same as I know it works both ways. Relationships require work and it can't always be one sided. People will start to feel like they don't matter anymore. Texting is so hard too as you can't get your true feelings across and it leaves room for misinterpretation. I prefer the old school talking on the phone which I find has been hard to schedule with my crazy schedule.

So on that note I am still planning and registering for this years races and trying to figure it all out. Think I have it figured out now to just register for them all and my son wants to join me on a bunch as well. He needs a part time job to start paying for his own race fees. lol

Sorry for all the Meme's below but just ones that say how I feel.

Until next time...