There has never been, nor will there ever be, anything quite so special
This has been a super hard couple of months. My last blog post talked about how August was bad but September/ October was harder. I miss the days when my son was happy and carefree. When he was willing to try anything. As he gets older it gets harder, didn’t realize how hard it could get. The 6 months leading up to his 15th birthday were hard. You now the usual hormonal stuff and wanting to not do anything anymore. Then two weeks before September we had to make a difficult choice and put our furry four legged best friend down. She was a year older then him and she was the only dog he ever knew and loved. While pregnant with him she would put her paw on my belly and made sure I was safe. She was attached to him from then on. They had a bond like I’ve never seen or experienced before. Don’t get me wrong Dually and I had a bond as well but nothing as special as the one they had. Then he turned 15 and started grade 10 in a school he hates with kids he doesn’t like, living in a town with absolutely nothing to do. Things took a turn, I had noticed before he’s had some times of being sad and depressed but always seemed to bounce out of it. This last month he hasn’t been. He got sick on top of all and that doesn’t help at all either. He has admitted to having suicidal thoughts and his mood has been angry, agitated and sad. He has been using gaming as his way of escaping the feelings. But he also stopped talking to me about things like he used to. I also haven’t been in the best frame of mind either so I didn’t notice the changes right away either. I to have been battling my own depression and mental struggles which doesn’t help things either. It boils down to spending more time together, he needs me more.
I had put the changes we both need in motion 7 months ago. I have been trying to sell my house so we can move back into the city. Where we both can spread our wings and be able to accomplish what we want in life together. I won’t go into those issues and anger I have with that but in September made a change to a new realtor and priced the house properly now and so we wait some more. I hate waiting... I’m not a very patient person. Once I set my mind to a goal I don’t stop until I get there. I just wish I could do this with my health. But again feeling stuck out here. Anyways I am getting side tracked here. A couple of weeks ago was really hard and my son hit rock bottom. I am so thankful that he did reach out and tell me these things, knowing he is reaching out for help in a subconscious way. Reaching out to me saying “hey Mom I need ya”! I am so glad that I put him first and left work to be there for him. I took the afternoon off, for him to see the Dr, we had lunch and he opened up so much more for me. He is on antibiotics to get over this infection he has, he decided to apply for a part time job in the mean time. We came up with an after school plan to spend more time together with either doing homework or just doing something. He started to smile some more which I haven’t seen in a long time. We talked about his thoughts and he understood the impacts and how it would effect others if he made the choice to commit suicide. He realizes it wouldn't just effect me, grandparents and other close friends of ours but his friend and his friends family too. I’m still worried and still keeping a super close eye on him. But we have a start and a plan to get thru this.
So while going thru this my parents have helped immensely but I had a bunch of friends reach out to help me, offer suggestions, listen to me, hug me and just to let me know I am not alone in this. Has meant the world to me in ways I can’t ever say to show my massive gratitude. But one of my friends reached out and she had the similar thing with her boys too but made the comment about something that I had been feeling as well. Going thru this I realized that there are things for the girls and this movement to help the girls but what about our boys? The ones that are caring, understanding, helpful, would never treat a girl badly, who opens doors for the girls at school, who helps them when they drop things, the ones who have a massive heart. What are we doing for our boys and helping to build their self esteem up, help build their confidence up, help them maneuver the hormones and stresses of teenage life? I am all for this empowering women but there are boys out there that need our help too. Ones that have given up on sports thanks to the shitty politics that comes with team sports. There are so many social stresses and more issues that teens go thru now then when I was a teenager and the suicide rate keeps climbing for both girls and boys every year. We need to help these kids and let them know what they are feeling is normal and that they won’t be judged for opening up and talking to someone. They need to know we are there for them and we need to make sure we make time for them. The boys need to be made they know its ok they are not always tough and strong. They need to know its ok to talk about feelings and feeling sad without being judged they are not manly enough. It takes a village to raise a kid especially being a single mom. I can’t do this all on my own but I have amazing people in our lives that can help us get thru this. We will get thru this and we both will be ok!
My son has been making small improvements with his thinking and talking more and more each day. So we are getting there. Also been having more play dates and sleep overs with my parents new puppy. Harley sure can make that kid smile a lot. I have been slowly coming around to Harley. Feel guilty for loving the dog when I had to make the hard choice to put the one I loved so much down. I still feel a void with her gone. I miss her like crazy. Harley though has been helping and I am slowly getting better. His first sleepover I feel helped that too. He is such a cute guy and dorky too.
Until next time...
i was going to post a usual post like I have been and I have one that I started ages ago, but a lot of things have happened in my life. I’m not sure where this post will go but it will be coming straight from my heart.
Before the August long weekend we lost an amazing lady that was my Step Grandmother. She was 107 and half years old. I wish I was able to spend more time with her as I loved hearing about her stories.
With starting the month of August that way there were some downs, some ups and downs. Got a couple hikes in which are always good for my soul. Did take the boyfriend away for a golfing weekend in Kimberly B.C. and it was a really great time. The forest fire smoke was bad again and I ended up in emergency. Also saw the lung specialist and we did more testing. She is trying to to find the route cause of my flair ups and getting more blood work done. Also have a lump in my right arm that got looked at finally and now I wait for a surgery date. Could be anywhere between now and 6 months. It’s causing nerve pain and has been hard with racing and working out.
It’s been a hard month, one that I am glad is gone despite some of the good that happened. I know I say this a lot that I am extremely grateful for those in my life. But I really am, I know who had my back and who doesn’t. I get to be the real 100% me and I don’t apologize for being me. I make mistakes and try to do what’s best.
I have had to make an extremely hard choice, one that I have known I was going to have to make eventually but not one I wanted to make. Our amazing Dog Dually turned 16 on May 28th. This past year she has been slowly having issues walking, started to loose her hearing and going blind. Evening of August 15th she had a stroke. August 16th we had the hard choice to have her put down. My son and I were there and my amazing boyfriend came down to be with us during it all. He was our rock and I will never be able to express the gratitude I have for him in doing that. Was the worst choice I’ve had to make but we were there for her until the end. We couldn’t not be there when they did it.
Dogs come into our lives to teach us about love, they depart to teach us about loss.
I know as time goes on it will get easier but right now I have good moments and sad ones. She was the most amazing best friend we have ever had and is greatly missed. 💕 💕
I feel like I have been rambling. I have so many thoughts in my head I am struggling to get them all out.
Been feeling frustrated with life lately, things that I can’t control are driving me nuts. I know it will happen when it’s ready but come on we are so ready for change. This is coming from someone who hates change... your thinking ya no you should be ok with it. But I have my moments. My son and I are so ready for the next steps in our lives and I feel like I’m stuck right now. My son started Grade 10 and turned 15. September is always a crazy busy month for us. We got a new realtor and really hope our house sells soon. We even have a new place picked out that we are waiting to put an offer in with the builder. I got to meet the boyfriends family this month and tried to not embarrass him too much at it. They were a lot of fun! They might not ask me back after it but it was fun. Lol Just me being the real dorky me! I turned older this month too. This week actually. Yup older and I’m in a funk from it. But my funk is brought on by so much in my life and nothing is budging to give me relief. I am trying to stop worrying and being annoyed at things. But I can only take so much but when it keeps going on and you see the same annoying shit that you can’t control it makes me so done. Like why should I care if they don’t. If they get away with it then why do I care and bust my ass for nothing. I feel like I want to run away from it all and hide. Just like I would do as a kid growing up. I would be busy playing and peopling and then say fuck this I need a break and avoid everyone for a couple of days. Mind you I didn’t say that. That one time I told my mom she was stupid but that was a hard lesson I learned back then. Lol But anyways my point is... well what is my point again? Oh right my point is adulting is hard and it sucks and I can’t run away. But I will always be me, be open and honest and live life to the fullest that I can at the time. Life is too short to not be you, embrace being you, you know the real you. Only the real people in your life will love you for you being you. Those are the only ones that matter, no one else. If they don’t like you it’s not your fucking problem it’s theirs. So stop worrying about it, stop being a people pleasure, and one I am learning is to stop caring so much about something when others don’t. You can’t do it all and your mental stability doesn’t need that added stress. Just do you! Just do what you can! Some days say Fuck It!!
So ya that is where I am at. Trying to run, trying to race and just trying to get the shit figured out in my head. Show the people in your life how much they mean to you. It doesn’t take much, a note, a card on a special occasion, a hug, simple words. You don’t need a ton of money to do it but it’s the thought behind that small gesture that means a lot. Knowing that someone took the time and that they care.
On that note I leave you. I won’t promise to write more blog posts but will post when I can.
Sorry part 2 has taken a bit to get out. Was dealing with some serious health issues to go thru and battle and wasn't in the right frame of mind to finish writing.
So this is all about the races...
Lets start with my 15km Eyeball the Wall race. Well it wasn't pretty at all, was slow but I still finished a few minutes faster then last year. When I finished my right foot was numb and extremely sore, asthma was suffering a bit during it and well not being able to train it's also harder on the body. Was always great seeing my friends that I have met while racing out there and had Melodie to keep me company along the way. Both our bodies are causing us issues. Getting old sure sucks. lol Had a free massage after and it was awesome. Sure lucky to know amazing people.
So since I had a heck of time racing that last race I had signed up for a little 5km race called Life Rocks 5k the Friday night after. I am a sucker for race bling but it was also a new race and along the river downtown Calgary. Pretty awesome location. It was a slow hot 5km race for me but still happy I got it done. Was nice to relax afterwards and hang out with friends.
Just when you think I had stopped and learned my lesson I had already signed up to a 10km race the Sunday after Fridays night race. I did the Calgary Police 10k Race with my boyfriend. He is way faster then me but I had my best and fastest 10k. Luckily it was all downhill at the start but the wind was horrendous and it was always looking like it could rain any minute. But the temp was perfect for my asthma and they felt stronger, just the running could have been better. We finished and got another free massage afterwards. Gotta like those free ones you get. hahaha
So then part one of my major health issues came out. I saw my Lung Specialist and had been having this almost asthmatic cough since my last race and it wouldn't go away. So she decided to put me on Prednisone. Well let me tell you... the side effect were horrendous and I was having a very hard time barely functioning while on the drugs. I also wasn't on a very high dose but it sure messed with me. I took the drugs until they were done and a few days after my asthma flared up again, for a few days until it got to the point of getting my parents to take me into the emergency to get my asthma looked after. Luckily we went back to the hospital where my Lung Specialist resides so that someone from her team could help me out. After a bunch of treatments to get my asthma under control they put me back on the Prednisone but double the dose then I was on last time. Yup you got it I even had more side effects to deal with. Was not a fun time that's for sure. While dealing with all this I had my physical and other health issues came out and one pretty serious. the other one could be a false positive. Fingers crossed the other one is just caused from all the different drugs I have been on for everything. Still waiting for the verdict on the first major one.
So while dealing with all that the month of May I was able to squeeze in two races as well. I know your thinking holly crap lady you need to slow down and rest. I know and I plan on it.
I was able to to the X Warrior Challenge Stadium Sprint and got in three laps in and could have done a 4th but didn't want to push things. The prednisone gave me massive adrenaline rushes which helped me get the race done. Proud I was able to to do it. Nicole stuck by me the whole time and we had lots of laughs along the way. Was lots of fun.
Then at the end of the month I did the Calgary Scotiabank Half Marathon. I had a time goal of being under the 3hr mark and had I given it more at the end I would have done that but instead I finished in 3hrs and 2 minutes. I was shocked and blown away. I cried lots during the race, especially at the end. All the volunteers were amazing and all the people who came out to cheer everyone is is such and awesome feeling. A week before this I was in the hospital for my asthma treatments. So to do this was amazing. My boyfriend ran his first Marathon and was able to finish it. He trained super hard for it. Super proud of him.
That brings me to now... This past weekend I completed the X Warrior Challenge Black Ops 12 hr Titan Race. Will write a new race recap and touch on my health issues in the next post. But the one good part is the one I was going thru I got the all clear last Thursday. I can get back to training and running again.
Until next time...
i know I could come up with a better title and with some extra thought I know I probably could. But seriously have been trying to write a post for months but I can’t get my thoughts out correctly. I go on a bit of a ramble (I know nothing new there) and end up deleting the whole thing and starting fresh. Life has been super crazy. Races were a plenty as well as my health took a turn for the worse. So if you can’t beat them join them right.
As I am writing this I don’t even know where to begin. I was smart with the title though saying it was part 1. Then I don’t have to bore you all with a long assed winded post. As I lay here in bed right now I am trying to figure out why am I going thru this shit. If it’s not one obstacle it’s another and why so much at once too. I mean I know I am a fighter and dam strong but seriously enough with testing me or pushing me to overcome some things. I get it I need to believe in myself more, fine I know I need to make lifestyle changes, yup working on it, and I know I need to stop the pitty party for one, that one is harder but I am working on it. I get so bloody frustrated with things and how badly I want to do something that when I have these things tossed into my life it makes me mad and frustrated. I know this year is all about finding my path and getting back into something that I can accomplish and feel better about myself. I have really amazing and great people in my life that I am lucky to know and support me in whatever I do. I am scared shitless of making a massive move for my son and I. Making sure I find the right place, making sure he gets into the school he wants, make sure he has what he needs to be successful in school and home life. I want him to be happier, more friends and more independent. I want to see him continue onto great and amazing things. He has lots of great goals and I love seeing him go after what he wants. My Dog will be 16yrs old on May 28th is starting to show her age, going blind and deaf, having some joint issues. So its getting to that point where I will need to make that hard choice to stop things for her. She isn't in tons of pain and is still moving but more slowly. It's a major hard choice, she was my first baby until the boy came along. The boy and her are extremely close as well. So that is always on my mind.
There are a few people I care about and I worry about them and what they are going thru. Wishing I could do way more to help them. But knowing they too need to go thru things on their own as well. Feeling helpless is hard but just trying to be there when they need someone to talk to does help. I am happy and content right now and can only give so much of myself away at this time. I need to concentrate on myself as well and not put myself aside. The old me would have but I can still do both and know I am helping in one way or the other. That is a huge thing for me. I know this year I have become more body aware of what’s going on inside me, not only in my health but my mental health as well. I am feeling more mature in my handling different situations and being more accepting of others. As a friend texted me the other day they said this “ I love that you accept him for who he is. The same way you accepted me... You are a beautiful person to see ones inner beauty” and yes my bff made me cry reading that. Everyone comes from a complicated past and everyone is different and unique. I will stand up for myself and I will walk away from something that isn’t making me happy and I know I can handle most things that come my way. We can’t get thru life on our own and sometimes we need someone to just be there to help us. Asking for help and admitting to what’s going on is the hardest steps to starting to overcome any life challenges. I just want to be the person that my friends and family can come to and be able to open up to me. To know that they can trust me enough, to know they are not being judged and I will be open and honest back with them.
So this part 1 is going differently then I thought. But as you know I am open and honest about my life. The good, the bad and the ugly! Lol My asthma has me scared again. Trying to figure out what it’s trying to tell me right now. So it flared up at a point in my life that I was feeling like I was stuck in vicious circle. I’ve gained weight from life/work stress, trying to find my workout mojo, wanting to run faster races and train harder, but lack of energy and emotional eating got me to where I am today. The good news is I am back on the eating plan. I am eating less junk food, drinking less pop and alcohol (new pills I am on for my asthma I can’t drink), walking more since I can’t run right now, and you know what I am feeling better. My insides are happier, I am adding in more workouts that are easier to just get back into it. Body weight exercises to start to work my way back up to weight lifting again. Gotta start somewhere. My asthma will settle down again and when it does I can keep kicking butt and moving up. I’ve already lost some weight in the first few weeks which isn’t much but will take it. I have noticed a few things change with my body and again will take anything. It’s not a fast process but least it’s in the right direction. A forward direction rather than a horrible circle of self pity.
I was going to talk about my races and more of my asthma. Well let’s just say that I had a personal best race last month that I am blown away and super proud of. I have had some good races and some bad ones. But still a finished race! Always a learning curve and just when you think you have it figured out BOOM 💥 a curve ball comes in and make life interesting.
So now you have to wait till part 2.... can’t you handle the wait?? I promise it won’t take me as long to get the next one out.
Until next time...
PS I am a new Brand Ambassador for Madera Outdoor, they have awesome products and the best tree hammocks around. Will post more in Products I Love Page but here is a quick link to order yours from here: bit.ly/2GfUh3O I shortened it so it’s easier to follow. I need to get my new hammock out hiking and get some pics of it. You won’t be disappointed. Check it out!
Food Porn... yup some of the amazing food I am cooking up!
“The purpose of life, after all, is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience.” — Eleanor Roosevelt
The month of March was a slightly busy one. I went to Lake Louise to race in the Blitz 10km Snowshoe Race. Made awesome time on the flat but ran into trouble when we were heading up to mirror lake turn around point. With the elevation my asthma was causing me major issues. It got to the point where I thought I was going to pass out. I had to turn back. Didn’t want to run into any troubles being way out there. My amazing friend Danielle came back with me and I was grateful or her making sure I was OK. Took me awhile to get better once we got back. I had fun hanging out with her more that weekend. We never seem to get the chance and only see each other at races and the odd other event. Was a nice quick weekend away and was also great seeing the other girls as well.
For St. Patrick's Day I had a team come together and we headed out to West Bragg Creek for our X Warrior 5k Virtual Race. We got all decked out in our best St. Paddy's Day gear and had a great time hiking and doing the penalties along the way. The weather tried to mess with us with snow and fog the day before but that day the sun gods were with us and we had great weather for it. Was nice having everyone together again. We went to a new pub afterwards to celebrate the victory of finishing.
So just an FYI X Warrior has the Canada Day Virtual one again and I have a team setup for it. We will be going out to the mountains again. Will post team sign up link in upcoming races soon. Come join me and if you can’t still sign up and do it wherever you happen to be.
My boyfriend and I went back to Floatlife to float again and see if the experience would go any better. We decided to try a 90 min one this time and we more prepared on how we would feel and what to do ahead of time. We picked our different music this time and were more relaxed getting setup and headed in to our own private rooms. I gotta say the 90 mins went by so much faster. I was able to relax and probably fell asleep for part of it. My mind was able to calm down faster and I didn't have any anxiety this time. I knew I wasn't going to be forgotten in there and I was able to focus on me and my alone quiet time. If you have't tried floating you need to... it seriously helps the body relax and heal. Your muscles feel better and I seem to have much better sleeps afterwards. If you haven't tried it I seriously recommend going. Especially for recovery from hard workouts and runs.
So the new life adventures that are happening are that I have put my house up for sale and decided to make a major change and move back into the city. This winter that seems to never want to leave has been making my commutes into the city dangerous and long. I am tired of spending more money for things and being father away from my job, boyfriend, friends and the gyms I want to go to more. I started boxing and want to take more classes but winter has gotten in the way. Juggling life as a single mom has been having lots of challenges, but extremely grateful my parents are able to help be me when I can't be me for my son. My son is fed up with the current High School he goes to. He wants a change and to go somewhere for a fresh start, go somewhere where he can be more himself and go to a place that doesn't know his past and can’t bring it up. The kids he is with now seem to never drop anything and seem to not want to grow up at all. He wan'ts more independence and to get a part time job. He wants to have things to do then be stuck at home in a small town with no one worth hanging out with. Since we started this he has been a lot more happy and is making a bunch of new friends in the city already. Nice seeing him hang out with kids that are more like him, kids that are respectful, nice and you can have meaningful conversations with. So send us your positive house selling vibes our way so we can make this happen and he can start fresh in September in the new school.
So that brings me to now... My asthma has been in the crapper. I have had to stop running and try to get my asthma to settle down. With it being nice here and then winter comes back its been to up and down for me to keep my asthma under control. I haven't ran more the 3 km last week and on Sunday I have a 15 km race to do. I wanted to be able to run faster and have better times I was working on a training plan for my half marathon and I was getting there. Then this happened... this always happens. But then i started to look at this setback a little differently. Not so negative, sure I am not happy about it but I need to look after my health and I did. When I can, I can start adding in more longer runs. I am going to run this 15 km and my awesome friend Sandi is joining me. I am grateful for our time out there and couldn't ask for a better race partner. We will laugh, get angry and cry along the way but whatever happens we will finish it together no matter what... we always do. I also looked at the amount of km's have ran this year. I have ran 154 km so far since January 1st 2018. That is way more then I have ran this time last year so I might just surprise myself. But Whatever happens will happen and I won't beat myself up over the outcome. The main thing is I finished and tried to do the best that I could. I see my awesome boyfriend running and training hard for his first Marathon end of May and seeing him run thru crappy weather, pains and sickness. He helps motivate me and I know when I can I will be back out there too pushing thru things and getting my training runs in too.
I run for myself and also for those that can't for whatever reason. I have been given a gift of being able to run and I want to keep doing it despite getting frustrated with my lungs.
Asthma WILL NOT stop me!!
I have been busy and will be getting busier with upcoming races now and just hope, really hope that winter can finally go away so I can get back to running and hiking more outdoors. Oh and that my house sells too. haha ;) So keep your eyes open for new races and how to join me on some as well as race recaps. I also see my lung specialist beginning of May and hoping she will be able to help me out again and help get me back on track. 🤞🏻
Until Next Time...
I know your thinking "that is some title you got there, what the heck are you up to now lady"? I am still training and added in this new floating stuff. No I haven't fallen off the turnip truck yet... really I am completely sober and of sound mind when I decided to try it. lol
I can actually say Training is still going well. Have had a few ups and downs but overall it's going really well. I know I am in just as much shock as you all. I have a training schedule I made and am sticking close to it and modifying it as I go depending on how the body is feeling. The whole key to all of this is the part of ME listening to my body... like actually listening to it and changing things to fit the needs of what and how my body is feeling. Also been working hard on eating healthier and making smarter choices. I am seeing changes too along with how the workouts go and how I am feeling. So I am pretty stubborn and I have been told lots of amazing advice along the way but you know I am finally getting it. But I needed to find my way and figure out what will work with me. It's all a trial by error process... you have good tries and other ones just don't work. I'ts a process to find what works with your body. I am still changing things and trying along the way. Haven't found the magic formula yet but getting closer. Asthma has been really great too and hasn't been bothering a ton. It still tried to flare up during Spin class once and awhile but overall things are great there too.
So this training thing.... I am adding weightlifting once a week but thinking of increasing it to twice. I am running 2-3 days a week, I am spinning once a week and doing Hot Yoga as well. Also just tried a float at Float Life and gotta say... it was bloody amazing! So I know your all dying to know WHAT IS FLOATING?? Well Floating is....
It Involves floating in a pod or room in my case that is designed for short term sensory deprivation. It is usually done within a large tank of super saturated magnesium water that makes you completely buoyant.
Float tanks are also called Isolation tanks or sensory deprivation tanks. While they sound like something out of a old school war movie, they have been used and are gaining popularity among elite athletes, people who struggle with various health problems and stress.
You can float anywhere from 60 to 90 min sessions depending on the place you go, you are in body temperature water that you can control the lights and sounds in my case. You can choose your music before the start of your float.
So now I know your thinking to yourself "well why would I want to do something like this that sounds a little crazy and far fetched"? Well let me tell you the benefits of it...
People have used floating to help with:
So the benefits of the magnesium (Epsom Salt) is that when you are floating in a tank like that your body is able to absorb the benefits of it very easily. Magnesium is known to help balance calcium levels in the body, balance hormones, reduce stress, reduce the rick of cancer, normalize blood pressure and reduce other diseases and much more. You float very effortlessly due to the Epsom Salts.
So here is what floating did for me (warning this may sound like it's coming from a crazy person lol)...
So we arrived at Float Life in Marda Loop, we were greeted in a calm, relaxed, and quiet atmosphere. We paid and were taken to a nice relaxing lounge were we waited to get a tour of the place. We were taken to a room where everything was explained to us. How to put the ear plugs in and how to work the light and sound controls. Also we had to use just soap to wash before and I gotta say the showers were awesome. We were in a room rather then a pod... later I was thankful for that as I am claustrophobic. The room was not large but bigger and taller and wasn't feeling so confined. You could have the lights on or off. I tried off once and had a panic attack... it truly freaked me out in every sense. I thought something was going to come in and grab me and I would never find the door and the light switch again. Maybe one day I will get there but for now I am good. I chose ocean sounds and for the first half I really liked it but afterwards wished I picked something else. There wasn't a ton of water in but enough to float in without touching the bottom. You literally could not sink in it... believe me I tried to put my fears at ease. Once I got in and started floating I could hear my breathing and that bothered me with the ear plugs a little but then I just got used to it and never really noticed it. I then zoned out and lost total track of time and wasn't sure if I slept or not but then opened my eyes when I felt my hand touch the edge of the float room. I was surprised to see I had rotated around and wasn't where I started. Then I started to act like a crazy person thinking that I was left in there and forgotten about and feeling like I had been in there forever. You totally loose track of time. After that mini panic feelings I settled back down and started to get back into it. When your float is over the music changes and that signals you to get out. Then you shower off with the soap and conditioner. They have a room with mirrors and a blow dryer. You can chill for a bit and have tea before you leave. Afterwards things that would normally set me off I was feeling more relaxed and so much calmer. My muscle soreness I had before going in was almost gone. The calm feelings lasted well into Tuesday and beyond. I was sleeping so much better as well. I want to go back for the 90 min one and now that I know what to expect I can calm down more and get into it more. But I highly recommend going to the bathroom before going into the room. Towards the end I felt like I had to pee really bad. Once I got out I was fine.
So ya that all happened and I am glad I finally tried it. Planning some epic hikes coming up soon as well as races start up again on March 10th when I tackle the 10km Snowshoe race in Lake Louise again. Then it's the X Warrior St. Patrick's Day virtual race and with my team, we are heading out and doing something different with it. So stay tuned. Going to be so much fun! If you are in Canada and want to take part even if you can't join us register today as it's almost sold out... Last I heard it's over 80% sold out... once it's done it's done!
Team Name is Stubborn Warriors.
Here is the link to register.... click here!
We are off to Banff next week to get away for a few days and to have some new adventures. I am really looking forward to the break and some time away. Time off over Christmas wasn't that exciting since we had -40 Celsius temps here and it was hard to go out and have some fun. We were cooped up at home and barely left the house.
Lots of things on the go, lots of changes but everything is moving along pretty good now. Just making sure I enjoy the journey along the way. Feeling extremely grateful and lucky!
Until Next Time...
Floating & Training pics oh my...
Sorry but I don't get why people fall for it. Yes it may be a new year but the trouble with doing those resolutions is that most don't keep them going. For me I kick start my training and trying to get my life somewhat figured out before. I am done that years races and then think about next years goals. I'm not saying my way is perfect at all and if you are one of the ones that can keep it up then that's awesome... good for you! I started in November... it's a hard month for me. Lots happen and lots of emotions which includes depression. My life is great but still battle my inner demons and stress really doesn't help matters. I took a break in December from writing... had so much on the go and work was very stressful. I tried writing but never got very far or put the words I wanted to say out correctly. In October I started working out with Boxing, Spin and Yoga again and man it has helped me. All those workouts helped improve my lungs. I didn't run until mid to late December for the first time. I was in shock... I ran more then I have at a time for taking running back up. I ran 5km and didn't feel like I was going to die... I know what is up with that. Slowing down and taking care of my lungs were exactly what I needed. I got out and hiked (not anywhere near as much as I want), rested lots and tried to get back to enjoying life again..... and I say trying very loosely lol.
Now that I’m back to making my races and running better I am also working on a plan to bring back weight lifting into my life. This year is about getting better and stronger. I just feel that this year is all about change in my life. You ever have a feeling like something is going to happen but you don’t know what is. Like a door is going to open up to something you never thought or considered? I have been and this time I hope it’s on the good spectrum rather then the bad. But as I found out in the past even if it’s bad I always have a way of turning it around and ending on a better note. I’m pretty adaptable and often think of myself as a chameleon since I do change to what’s around me without loosing myself in the process. I still maintain my true self. I am proud of who I have become and what I have survived thru to get here. I know whatever comes my way I will figure a way around it. I am proud of my son, knowing I had a major hand at how he has turned out. I love seeing him grow and change. How he came thru the divorce really well. How smart, compassionate, helpful teenager he is. He has his brain dead moments but those are rare at the moment. So many things I’m proud of that I have done including raising him. Truly grateful for those who are in my life that I share life’s moments making memories with. Love my family and friends!
I have some of my races planned out and registered for. My awesome boyfriend gave me a race registration for the Calgary Scotiabank Marathon doing the half marathon distance. I am going after the X Warrior Axe. You have to complete an X Run, Stadium, black ops 12hr and a wilderness run. I was already registered for two and decided to try the 12hr night one and go back and do the wilderness one again. They are truly an amazing race series. Where they are for every type of fitness level and ability. Where the volunteers are super supportive and encouraging as well as other racers on the course. They will help you out along the way if you ask. So if you haven’t tried one you really should. Just email me and I would love to help answer your questions and point you to the right place to register. I also have teams at the races and your always welcome to join it and meet new people! If we have enough you get team perks as well. Come join me and try something new. A race for everyone in the family! I was going to do my 25k trail race but it fell the same weekend as one that was already booked. But might add one in later in the year. We will see.
This month I tackled running 5km a day for 10 days apart of the OCR Guy Challenge 10 Day 50k Ultra. I took two days off and two days I ran/walked 10km so I could finish. Ended up finishing with 52km in 10 days. I had some good runs, some bad ones and one really amazing one. So happy with the results and learning experience. I will post a pic of the stats that Glen did for everyone that took part in it. The stats were so awesome and was pretty cool to be apart of it!
Well with that I leave you guys. Happy new year and wishing you all great successes and health in 2018!
Until Next Time...
Well so to speak. I am trying to make my fitness comeback after having a horrible summer with my asthma, and only being able to barely complete my races. But things have been going well. I found a new love of heavy bag boxing. I have the gloves, wraps and shoes now. Been able to take up newbie deals at gyms in the city so I can try new things while saving some money. Also started spinning and gotta say its up there on my new likes for workouts. Been back doing yoga again since I missed it so much. Sure helps keep my body moving better. Already seeing and feeling changes which is always a good thing. I think I will modify my webpage to add links to the gyms I love going to. I created one for upcoming races and one clothes I get to represent. I really need to get better at posting pics of the clothes and one line I am waiting for the stuff to show up. Whoops sorry I got side tracked there. Lol Sadly that happens in real life so why shouldn’t it happen in my blog too. 🙄
So these new classes I am going to have been amazing. Getting to meet new people and love learning/trying new things. Tried a bootcamp workout at Forma Fitness, Spin and Yin Class and Yin Class at Hop Shop, Boxing at Sweat Science, also went and tried another boxing class at Rumble, went to a spin class at Soul Spin Studio. They have been fun and getting me into trying new things. My coordination for spin class is interesting and I am slowly getting better compared to my first ever Class. With doing all these classes I am starting to get the mojo back to running and wanting to try running on a regular basis again. I do have lofty goals for 2018 in that aspect so now is the best time to get back into it.
I got my triathlon bike tuned up, setup on the indoor trainer, and got it working better. Also working on finding a good website I can go to that I can race other people on. Dug out my old stand-up fan so I can use it on the treadmill and the road bike. Started planning workouts in my gym and the bootcamp I went to got the juices flowing. Love weight lifting and will be getting into that again. It helps since we de-cluttered the basement so I don’t see that while working out. Slowly making changes to the house now that we have been here four years.
Along with the other decisions I have made I am getting back into meal prepping. Want to get into that more again since I felt better when I did. Feels great to find the missing mojo again. It was so lost the last year and a bit. Ever since March 2016 when I almost died the third time. It’s been a slow progress of ups and downs but have been learning so much about myself and asthma along this journey.
I have so many inspiring friends and seeing them tackle their goals has really motivated me more. I just wish I could get my lungs to agree that this is god for them and that they need to really stop fighting me so much. But I am being smart and taking my time working on them and building them up again. Letting them take the time to heal a bit more and slowly pushing them harder and harder. It’s so hard to not just be go go. I just want to do it all right now. I need to step back and just enjoy the journey and keep learning about myself. It’s gonna happen and it’s not going to be easy. But if it was easy would I really want to be doing it? Would I still have the determination and stubbornness about it? You know I probably wouldn’t. If I didn’t have the challenges that I have had would I still be the person I am today? You know I don’t think so. I was given this because I was strong enough to handle it and not let it stop me. Those that know me know I won’t go down without a fight.
Will be adding more running into things at the end of the month to see how my training this month either helps it or see if it doesn’t. Also hiking lots as well which is my happy place and can’t get enough of. I am always up for mountain adventures with my favourite people.
I am working on deciding my goals for next year and see what races are a must do. So far I am doing a few Half Marathons and working on improving my times for them. Plus will see what the cards hold for me as well.
Will keep you updated on my progress and let you know if this training thing makes running easier.
Until next time...
Asthma may indeed suck but it also shows me what I can do when I put my mind to it. I have a love/hate relationship with my asthma. Without my struggles with it I wouldn’t be where I am at today. I wouldn't appreciate the things I do today. But I also do get tired of the struggle and always trying to get my goals accomplished around it. I get frustrated when trying to finish a race, hike or just going to work and it acts up. This summer has been one of my hardest summers dealing with it. I have been trapped in my house and not able to exercise because of it. I am on more drugs to keep me going. My major trigger with my asthma is forest fire smoke, second is outside temperature (heat or extreme cold) when trying to run/exercise and thirdly is stress. This summer has been all three. I am one of those people that are super in tune with their body and can tell when something is off. I have been good about resting when I have needed it but the challenges arise with my races. All the races I have done this summer have be major challenges to overcome. Nothing came easy and I fought to the bitter end to cross that finish line. With all the environmental problems out there I was forced to not work out and train as much as I wanted. Thru this all, I do in fact know that I am one mentally strong chick! I also know that if I talk to a bear stalking me he will get tired of me calling him Bob and will wonder away and harass other racers. I for sure thought that would have caused him to want to eat me just to shut me up. He also wasn’t inclined to giving me a piggy back to the finish line either. Bob isn't all that cool. Haha
I feel really proud though that I was able to finish every race and didn't have to stop and walk away. I just want to get back on track, I want to workout more like I used to and be able to go running when I want. I miss it sooo much. I need to get back to doing it. I feel lost without it, not completely lost but feeling very offside.
I completed my Spartan Trifecta on September 16th in Seattle with the Beast. It was a fun race with my US friends but a hard one. I got to the bucket carry and at that point I was seriously considering stopping and walking away. The forest fire smoke and the heat were getting to me along with some dusty conditions. I posted a pic of me on FB at that moment and I almost broke down in tears waiting for the guys and my son to finish the bucket carry. I took two of my drugs and was able to carry on but a lot slower and missing some obstacles. At that point it was about survival and finishing it. Some people gave me looks for not doing an obstacle but I don't care. They had no idea what I was going thru and how hard it was to keep breathing to keep going. I am in the open heat, not going for time or money, I was running my own race. I wasn't about to make my health worse to complete an obstacle when I was waiting for my friends to complete it. The first half of my race was awesome and I was doing great... time went on and things got worse. I had a few people come up and offer to help me and that was super awesome... people like that is what kept me doing these races. They are all about helping each other. I get it if you want to play by the rules... they have heats for that.. elites and competitive. I run open so I can keep challenging myself and get better on my own but also have the help when I need it.
My trip to Seattle for the Spartan Beast with my son was a really great trip. He and I had a great time and ended up getting some great deals on clothes for his new school year. We raced, had a great dinner with friends and went to the car races. Sunday we slept in (I was a little hung over lol), we checked into our hotel near Sea-Tac and then spent time in downtown Seattle. We took in the underground tour finally and hung out at Pikes Market and the Pier with our friend Tim. Had an amazing Birthday seafood dinner and eventually made our way back into the hotel. Monday we flew back home and relaxed. Last two birthdays have been pretty good I gotta say. I did miss having one person with us in Seattle but next time we head down I hope he will be able to make it and it won't be for a race so we can have more time seeing more things there. :)
Had a great weekend in September. I got to spend lots of time with my new guy. We went on this awesome hike out in the mountains, had a great dinner and drinks and then a nice soak in the hot tub. Sunday relaxed and got some things cleaned up at the house outside. Nice having some projects done and less things to have to worry about. Now I just have to keep tackling the indoor projects but first need this cold I have had a week to leave and go away. lol
Reading all the posts about the Spartan Beast race in Sun Peaks BC has had me wondering what my future races will look like. I was sad to be missing out as I love the location but after hearing how bad it was I was glad I wasn't there. I think that would have turned me off Spartan races officially. I missed the people and being there but not the race. That thought alone had be thinking about what I want to do next year for races. Will have to do some pondering and think about what goals I want.
On October 1st I ran the Gorilla Run in YYC. I put together a 4 person relay team called The Stubborn Warriors. We each ran a 4km leg of the race. It was great but we could have done without the wind. Ran my fastest 4k in a long time, had a awesome running partner along the way and my relay was fantastic. In the mixed team category we came in 23rd place with a time of 1:45:43. Dale ran his leg in 20:57 (he ran a half marathon the day before too), Ty ran his in 23:26, Melodie and I were in the 30 and under minutes. I would do this race again for sure. Was neat running thru the Zoo too.
Next up is the X Run in Calgary and in Edmonton. If you haven't signed up you really should. They also have virtual heat as well so you can still be apart of it if you can't make either location. Check out http://xwarriorchallenge.com/events/ Join my team Stubborn Warriors!!!
Will leave you with a few pictures from the races and fun times.
Until next time...
My asthma hasn't been very happy lately. So many things interfering with it that it's becoming a pain. Not really a pain but more like a very bad frustration that is getting to me. I keep coming up with game plans to work around it but something else comes up and I start back at square one again. As you guessed it I am back at square one desperately wanting to get back on track and find my mojo again. I really miss it.... like really miss it. I have decided to take up boxing. I took a class and LOVED IT!! Now the plan is trying to find a place that works with my crazy schedule but also I can do with my son. He has since decided he wants to try it out and see if it's something he would like to do. Would be a super cool thing for him and I to do together.
I have done a few races since I last posted. Well they were races that were finished but took longer then wanted and expected. But they all ended up being a total blast, and I met new people too which is even better.
Red Deer Super Spartan went good but slow which was ok as I was able to hang out with some awesome people. The new layout was great and making it more like the US ones was nice to see too.
Rugged Maniac was a blast as usual and never a boring race. Had a lot of fun along the way.
Calgary Spartan Sprint... ya I know I vowed to never run it again but decided to since I needed a sprint to just get my single trifecta. Getting a double and triple trifecta were hard work getting to them but also my lungs and asthma were much happier. The new layout was better and it was slightly harder but still don't like the track its on, no shade at all and we didn't get anything at the end of the race either other then our shirt and water. It was sooo hot and dusty as well which is never a good thing for my asthma.
Went to Montana for our annual vacation with the parents and as always had a great time, relaxed a bunch and got some exercise in for the first time in awhile. Don't know what it is about it but I always feel pretty great when I am there. One of my second homes for sure.
Also some other exciting things are going on in my life.
I was nominated by my amazing friends to have an article published online about me. It was a huge honor to have been selected. Charity writes these and I have been following and reading her work for awhile now. If you haven't been reading her stuff you seriously need to. Here is the link to mine CLICK HERE!
Also been asked to be featured for a new thing they are wanting to start up in Calgary and that will be featured end of this month. Not sure exactly when but think it's an awesome idea and something up my alley for sure. Will post more once it's posted out there.
Another cool thing is I was also approached from a clothing line to rep and I can't wait to get my order in. Once I get my things I will post a link and pics as well I will have a coupon code for 15% off. Super cool I know!!
Its feeling super weird for me to be approached for things like this. I am just trying to make it thru this thing called life and stumbling as I go along. Learning along the way and making changes as I go. I am glad I can help others out there that might going thru something like I am or have gone thru. I want everyone to know they are not alone and can reach out anytime about anything. No judgement EVER!!! Just oodles and oodles of support, love and encouragement.
I am just super excited for the future and just need to get over this asthma bump in the road I am going thru. I will get thru it eventually. As a friend reminded me that without the troubles I have been having with these lungs I wouldn't be where I am at and be the person I am today. Words that hit me hard and spoke so much truth. I need to have a little more patience and just keep doing what I can. Need to focus that I am still alive and able to keep doing this even if my races are slow right now but I will make my comeback and when I do I will be that much more stronger and more determined. Best part is I have someone amazing in my life to get to know and have awesome adventures with. Our Hike was so much fun. Just the start of this new chapter!
I am posting below some of my fav pics from races and hiking fun!
Tomorrow heading to up north to Boneyard for X Warrior Wilderness race. Going to be racing and volunteering up there for a crazy day trip adventure!
Until Next Time...
Red Deer Spartan Super
Rugged Maniac in Calgary
Calgary Spartan Sprint
Hiking in Kananaskis <3 :)
,What can I say about this month... Lots on the go and full of emotions too. You see I ran my 5th Half Marathon on May 28th in Calgary. I started it with mixed emotions... lots of mixed emotions. My son came down sick the Wednesday before (he was supposed to do the race too), I rolled my ankle doing an amazing 14 mile hike with my awesome friends and I am not anywhere I want to be in my training. So despite that I still drug my sorry ass all alone into Calgary to meet up with friends... friends who help keep me accountable, friends that support me... friends that encourage and are ears to listen to me. You see without these amazing people in my life I don't know where I would be right now. I am extremely blessed to know and have all these amazing people in my life now. So ya I showed up... I really did... despite my hesitations and injuries. Went with the goal of to finish. Didn't care how long it took but just to finish it. Sandi and I stuck together thru it all and I mean we had some pretty shitty situations we had to deal with (inside joke... might tell it one day but not yet lol). We were making amazing time... beat my fastest 10K time, we beat our time from the 15km Eyeball the Wall race earlier this year... we were on a roll, we laughed... boy did we ever laugh, we cried... lots of tears, we might have gotten engaged to a bridge (again might have to tell the story later), we hugged lots. But was the best race in a long time. I might have finished 12 minutes slower then last years time but still that's a pretty awesome win with a bummed ankle. But you wanna know what?? My asthma was amazing thru the hot heat we were dealing with. If our bodies weren't crapping out (lol) on us and we were able to keep that pace up we would have finished faster but that is a new goal for next year and lets hope next year no injures or asthma issues to deal with.
My son is finishing up his Grade 8 at his school and moves onto High School next year. I have to admit its making me tear up lots seeing him go onto this next big chapter of his life. I am so freaking proud of him and seeing him grow as a person. I know I say it a lot but we have been thru so much shit that it's nice to see who he has turned into and develop his own identity on a good path. We just had his last Band Concert at school and last week we had his commencement. We went shopping for his Grad outfit and again I teared up seeing him dressed up. Looking forward to new things with him at his new school. Hi grad night was a lot of fun and was great hearing more stories about the kids he went to school with.
My friend Pam's Birthday was this month as well and it was a hard day for me to deal with. Her first one knowing she wasn't here to send her wishes. The jokes and laughs we have gone thru.
I am looking forward to June being done, Soccer being done and some rest without driving everywhere. Plus some fun races coming up too. Also some time away is always a good thing too. I just need a break and a recharge. June has been the most overwhelming month for me to survive and get thru. But you know what? I am strong and I can do this but I just hope to still have some of my sanity and hair left. I mean it's taken me 4 yrs to get my hair this long. lol
I will leave you with some pics from my awesome Hikes, graduation and Half marathon!
Until Next time...
I was doing really well posting on a regular basis then I seemed to have fallen again and now May is here. Not sure where April went other then it was a extremely busy time in my life trying to juggle everything and everyone in it. March went by fast when you spend two weeks of it in beautiful Maui.
Not sure how to start this post and feel like I am rambling again. I haven't been feeling myself lately ever since I got back from Maui. I was so happy, so relaxed there and I was really sad to have had to leave. I would go and move there in a heart beat if I could. But if I did my friends and family would have to come to since I have some really awesome friends that I don't know what I would do without. Work has been stressful to say the least and I feel worn out. I am happy though that more races are happening again. I guess I feel lost and need to get back into a workout routine and that will then make me feel happier, healthier and stronger for my races too. I'm the type of person that likes routines and my routine keeps getting messed up and I can't stick to a plan for my workouts, work has been stressful so I come home exhausted and last thing I want to do is workout. Good news is the weather is getting better so I am going to force my butt out the door and run/walk at lunch. One that will get me away for an hour, two I will get the exercise I need, and three I will feel like I am accomplishing something to help combat the stress. Being a full time single mom is tiring from having to do it all. I also don't want my son to miss out on opportunities and sports just because I am too tired to get him there or work gets in the way. Super grateful for my parents and having them help me out with him and other things I need or rides or whatever it is that comes up. lol
But our trip to Maui was an amazing one, full of rest, adventures and trying new things. Got to spend some awesome time with my son and parents. Made so many new memories and some adventurous times. We went hiking, snorkeling, did the road to Hana, Haleakala Crater, covered lots of the island seeing what we could. Saw lots of different beaches including the black sand beach and spent time relaxing on the beach too. Did a little running too while there and completed the X Warrior Virtual St. Paddies Day 5k Race. Was the perfect location to do it too. We were so relaxed while there it was hard to come back to reality and busy everyday life.
Since I have been back I have kept at the racing with completing Eyeball the Wall 15 Km April 29th, then did the Wings for Life App Race and race with over 156,000 people across the world at the same time. Ended up finishing 5.8km before the catcher car caught up to me. Was a super cool thing to be apart of and helping raise money for spinal cord research. Running for those that can't... falls along the same lines as what I do with my asthma. I am running for those that can't and have it way worse then I do. Also I am running for my friend Pam who passed away from Breast Cancer in November 2016. Her and I started this journey together with running and I am going to keep going until my lungs and body tell me otherwise.
This past weekend my son and I went out to race in the X Warrior Challenge Titan heat. I have to say I survived it but sadly my son was only able to complete one lap. A soccer injury flared up halfway thru the first lap. Was super proud of him tackling the obstacles head on. I ended up completing the minimum 3 laps to get the Titan medal. It consisted of approx 21.2km covered and 78 obstacles. According to my Garmin I did 62 stairs and walked over 30,000 steps that day. We did it in under 5 hrs and had up to 6hrs from our start time to complete as many laps as we could or wanted. Surprised myself on things and over came more challenges I face with racing. My asthma however could have been better but despite having to use my inhaler as much as I had to I felt relatively OK and didn't let is slow me down to much. As always it's so awesome to see soooo many friends there and even the two guys that I met and stuck with me during my Seattle Spartan Beast last year came up to try it out. I can't help but spread the love I have for this race. Everyone needs to try it once!! They also released the 2018 Dates and May 12, 2018 is it!! Register today to save money on early bird prices!! I have a team setup that you can join and it doesn't matter what heat you want to do, Join the team! This year we got team perks and you never know what may happen next year. So let's do this together!! The team name is Stubborn Warriors and the link is HERE. I came up with that name since I seem to be stubborn but also we are all warriors in our own way. My main page has all the details on it here.
Everything else in life keeps ticking on and I keep plugging away at the usual challenges, soccer mom scheduling, work life, social life and that so called dating life if you want to call it that. haha Still have my moments of feeling of being overwhelmed trying to handle it being a full time single mom that works full time too. Lets just say life is never boring and I look forward to my down time a lot.
Also made some changes to this site by adding a Upcoming Races page with links and some discount codes as well. So check it out and let me know what you think!
Until next time...
My title this time say's it all.... almost a month of being sick and no able to workout at all. Just after I posted my last blog post I because sick. After suffering a week I went to the doctor finally and I had a very bad case of bronchitis and a bit of pneumonia. Being an asthmatic you know what that's like if you have it and it's not a good thing to have to endure. it's one of the worst things we could possibly go thru. Of course it made my asthma flair up bad and I was stuck in bed a week thanks to it. The worse part is it's taken me until this the end of February to finally start to feel someone normal.
The end of February I made some slow progress to getting back to working out... went for walks along the river since I can't fully run yet and was able to walk fast with not as many issues. Felt great to get back into it but also to start working out again. We have been having some really nice temps too and that is always a good thing to get some sun and fresh air.
Went away to BC for the long weekend to get some rest and fresh air. Tried to workout twice that week after the weekend away and things are slowly getting better. I was hoping to get back to running without coughing soon so I can do harder workouts.
But as time went on and my lungs started to heal from the sickness I was able to push harder. Ended up running my fastest 5K yet on the dreadmill. I am also finding the dreadmill isn't so bad after all and is better running on it then in the cold and making my lungs mad at me. Been interesting seeing how fast my body heals and how it always seems to come back a little bit stronger.
In February I had a new lung test done that got to the root of whats going on in my lungs. I wasn't fully better from being sick but they wanted to go ahead with it. My lung specialist was blown away at how my lungs are amazing and still functioning with all that I have been thru. She doesn't understand how I am able to keep going like I do despite my asthma. She won't be changing my meds either even though I have been on them for 20 some years. She likes what she see's and here is hoping they will let me push harder and complete harder race challenges this year.
I am excited for this year still and what lies ahead and new things coming into my life. Just learning to take it one day at time and slowly working on other challenges outside of my race/working out world. more on a personal financial front. Plus my house stuff too now that I am home more it needs things fixed and organized better. Slowly and surly I will get there. I am also on the Canada Spartan Street Team and in the pictures below have a 20% off coupon code ( BETTERKM17 ) so use it as many times as you want and share it with your friends. Saving money on spartan races is always a good thing.
So you won't believe this but I am going to more yoga classes and now have two that I absolutely love. Words I never thought would come out of my mouth. I love love love Hot Restorative and Warm Hips and Hams that stretches out my sore, very tight runners legs. The Hot Restorative leaves me feeling so relaxed and happy afterwards and the next day. I have no road rage driving home from the city at all that night. lol
Oh and not going to brag but my family and I have an awesome Maui vacation coming in 5 days. :) So that means I need to get a pedicure to cover up my scary runners toes. lol I feel bad for the person that gets to look and deal with them but I decided I need a professional to take care of things rather me trying to make them look pretty! lol
Will post again after our awesome family vacation!
Until Next time...
For some it's a lot of new years resolutions or for others like me it's a continuation on working on our goals. We either start new challenges, refresh our workout plans, adjust yearly goals and just trying to look after our well being so we can continue this journey.
My Christmas days off I tried to make the best of them, relax more and I was able to workout everyday I was off. I also heard about this new Challenge that the OCR Guy Challenge put out for the new year. The Challenge is to run 5km a day for 10 days to complete a total of 50km. Doesn't seem so bad does it? As it turned out it wasn't and I was able to complete 50km for the year so far. I learnt so much about myself, was proud for sticking with it for 10 days and learning more about my asthma. I documented everything so I can show my lung specialist. I have to have a test next month that I am nervous for having to do but also excited to learn more about what's going on in those lungs too. We are digging deeper and finding out what makes them tick.
Whatever your goals are for the year, write them down and hold yourself accountable to them. If you don't you will fail. You should be choosing them based on what you want and not to compete with others but only yourself. If you do it for the wrong reasons your not always going to succeed. Lessons I have since learned. After my depression bought I am having a hard time getting back on track but am trying harder to do it thanks to my goals and races I have signed up for. This year for me it's all about race performance and not about quantity. I got it out of my system and I proved to myself I can do a ton of races back to back. But I don't need to do that anymore. I want to perform better at the races I do and have faster times and be less fatigued going into them. I want to be more rested and let my body recover better. I want my training to be better and start overcoming some challenges with that. I am also going to continue to make better eating choices to and continue to eliminate some of the bad food I eat. It's hard work and it takes time, Its going to be a bumpy road full of ups and downs but I will get there. I have the knowledge I just need to stop being lazy and go for it. I used to use my fitness pal religiously and it was getting to the point where I was getting anxiety that I had to log in everyday to keep my streak going... was not the anxiety I needed. I got up to 614 days and I just stopped. I feel so much better. I am going to use it to track my workouts and when I am trying new foods to see how my nutrition goes for the day but I can't be tied to it like so many others are tied to the weigh scale. These tools are great to get started. But I can't let it control my life anymore.
I am am starting to dig deep and find out what is causing me stress and anxiety and work to eliminate it or reduce it. Also this year is about trying new things and finding things I can do to help my body recover from training and races and also help my well being. Will be getting massages once a month, will see my chiropractor once a month to stay in aliment, I already use my roller but will be doing more. I want to find things that help calm my mind and allow it to relax. All about reducing stress, recovery and over all well being. I'm not getting any younger and I want my body to still be able to carry me without crippling it. I love racing but people can't keep doing so many races in a year without effecting their body in a negative way. I know I have tortured my body and needed so many medical people to out my body back together. Hard lessons I had to learn and part of me doesn't regret it but I finally get why my coach Lisa wanted me to take it easy. Happy today that I get it! But also I had my best racing year last year doing so many but at the same time was lucky I didn't end up with a major injury from using my body so much for all those races.
I want to spend more time with friends and being in the mountains. Hard to do that when every weekend your racing. I wish I had better work life balance and I am still working on finding it. I am always open to new opportunities and changes.
One of those new opportunities was before Christmas I was chosen to be an Ambassador for X Warrior Challenge. It's a huge honor to be chosen as one of the first and for an amazing race. They have big dreams and goals and it was homegrown in Calgary AB. Looking forward to seeing where this goes and also to race it in May 13th. The first race was last year and running one lap wasn't enough so this year my son and I are going after the Titan multi lap version. The also put on other runs and one was New Year's Day and we did a 5k. Was fun and a great way to start the new year. Afterwards went out to a bar with friends and had some awesome laughs. They have so many different heats, some for the kids too and if you want get a team together you can get some added perks for your group if you get enough to join it. What are you waiting for lets do this May 13th!! Click HERE to register!! Join the movement and try new things!! #noexcuses
On the topic of trying new things my son and I did that too. We finally went to a yoga class that was warm and geared towards Hips and Hamstrings. After running 5k for 10 days my legs were unbelievably tight. No matter what I tried to loosen them I just couldn't. So off to yoga we went and wow what a great time I had. On a side note afterwards I felt my lungs being able to open up more and get deeper breaths plus my body is moving much better. So I will be going back and making it a regular thing in my life. My son Ty not sure if he will come back but he might.
Until next time...
I'm not sure what it is but I always find these last few years that the month is a hard one for me. I know a lot of it is coming down from my racing high that I have after racing so much. Could also be the change of the seasons, less seeing my race friends. But also this time my friend Pam passed away after a lengthy battle with Cancer. I am doing better about it now but at first it was hard. She would be upset if she knew I was carrying on this pity party too long so I am working on getting my butt back into gear, going to eat better (which I had started already) and going back into a better routine working out. I have new goals for next year... less races but more challenging ones. By challenging ones I mean longer ones. I have to force myself to get out there and tackle these as I want to be more successful
then just going out to do my best and finishing. I mean don't get me wrong finishing one will be just as awesome but I want to push myself and finish better.
I saw what I could do this past year and its shown me lots of amazing things.... things I was scared to do and try. I am not scared of racing solo in a Spartan now. I know when push comes to shove I can pull off more obstacles on my own then I thought I could do or gave myself credit for. I love racing with friends too so it's hard to choose. Racing with my son is an awesome thing as well and watching him conqure his own things has been so amazing. Seeing how he has changed from his first race to how he ended his spartans was so neat. Being there his whole spartan journey and getting his first trifecta was pretty awesome. Watching him come up with his own goals and seeing him work hard towards it too. I am pretty proud of that kid and seeing the young man he is turning into. He also has been having a very successful sports career on his school teams... Flag footaball their school went undefeated and with Volleyball the boys team went undefeated as well. He also loves playing up this year in competetive soccer on a U16 team. So looking forward to seeing him continue to be successful in whatever he chooses to do while in school and in life.
Since my last race in October I have been battling despression... it's been hard. I get invited out to things but cancel last minute for numerous reasons. Mostly I have been so exhausted and tired. Needing a break and it turned out to hiding out at home. I got out the odd time but mostly kept to myself. I wouldn't respond to people when they texted and felt not too engaged in life. Then throw in a friend passing away and well things went more downhill. Also going thru an unknown what to do with my life faze. I can't decide what I need to do to find that balance that I used to have but don't have anymore. But I know people mean well when they try and cheer you up but some of the things they said just don't help people who are depressed... least not with me anyways. We know we have tons of people that care about us and we know we are lucky to have what we have. Sometimes it is just nice for someone to say they understand and you go ahead and feel what you need to feel. It would be nice to have someone sit with you and not say a word but let you talk if you want. Sometimes it's hard but we will eventually crawl ourselves out of the hole we dug ourselves into. Sometimes it can happen sooner and other times like this case eneded up being about a month. There is no ryhm or reason why we feel what we do... we just do.
With the last month that's been going on I am really looking forward to 2017. I am going to keep on my path and challenging myself with new goals. I am going to rest more and help my body recover better. Also take time to enjoy life as well with fewer races. Maybe during that journey I will find the balace I'm looking for and find peace with a few more things. Maybe come up with some solutions that have been plaguing me. I am just glad that my son is on a happier path now and is feeling stable in life after all that we have been thru. We both continue to grow and learn. After all life is about finding your own path and making the best of your time here, making memories and being just a good person.
I can't believe Christmas is almost here. I am never ready but I am especially worse this year. So on that note I want to wish you and yours a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Hope all your dreams, wishes and goals come true!
Until next time...
Well what can I say... not sure where to start. I've been wanting to write a post since my Seattle Spartan Beast but every time I go to write something I don't know what to write. I guess I am still in shock with my performance and like most races I have looked back and thought I could have pushed even harder in spots. But I was listening to my body and my body was starting to hurt in places. I wanted to be able to finish and keep the pain from getting worse. I also realized I am so mentally tough... stronger then I thought and I thought I was strong... times where I was feeling like I wanted to slow down but then found more motivation to push thru and pick up my pace. I mean I got from the start to the first bucket carry in 47min... crazy and I thought my Garmin was lying to me the whole race. I kept thinking I am not really moving that fast... nope it's slow and having issues with the GPS... it doesn't know what it's doing. lol I should also mention this was my first race running solo too. I was so nervous the night before. The girls I was staying with thought I could do it in 6hrs and I thought that was probably doable. Least I was was going to try to do it around 6hrs. It didn't have the elevation as Montana and Sun Peaks and I did those around 8.5hrs and faster then the year before. But I was so blown away and ended up finishing in 5:05:12.... I know right an hour faster then I was hoping to complete it. I also got to see what I was really made of. I LOVED LOVED LOVED that course, location and the obstacles. It is a me race and location. My asthma was so much better, my lungs were strong and my body was strong too. Morning of the race I was calm and relaxed and was ready to tackle this. I ended up finishing with two guys from down there and we had some great laughs along the way. I nailed most of the obstacles except the usual rope climb, multi rig, monkey bars and the new one but that one I got halfway across. Yes I nailed the Spear throw and the Z wall too. So guess what.... my upper body is going to be tackled and will be getting stronger now.... enough is enough and time to stick to a workout plan targeting that, my core and overall strength. Seattle beast was a runners course with wicked technical terrain that I absolutely love... like I said it's made for me. I love flying over logs and trees... there was enough water at the right spots to keep my body cooled down and my body working great. The slippery muddy trails in a couple spots were interesting but always fun. It's gotten me so excited that in 2017 I want to do way more trail runs and work on getting faster in the uphill parts and I know I love running downhill. Yes I am one of those crazy fools that love downhill running... I don't get why my body likes it so much but it does... it rebels at the uphills so that is what I am working on next.
This past weekend ran with friends at the Dash of Doom 5km race in Calgary. Three of us and the dog dressed up as ninja turtles. Was another fun one that was nice to take it easy after a awesome CrossFit workout and the Beast in Seattle. Let's just say my legs were shot but it helped loosen me up a bit. That night though I couldn't walk very well but the next day it got easier and easier. As Lisa would say "active recovery" and "roller"! Lol Oh and CrossFit was my first experience with it... I LOVED it... not having a mostly leg workout 4 days after a 12ish mile Spartan Beast but I still loved it and pushed thru it the best I could. I couldn't let my son's U16 soccer team see me fail. lol
I am very pleased with how things have been going and I know what I need to really work on for next season. I can't wait!! Bring it on!!
Find your passion and just go for it... No Excuses!! Where there is a will there is ALWAYS a way!!
Until next time...
I happened to have just watched that movie for the 2nd time. Its a movie that I seem to get something from and makes me look deep inside my sole. The first time I watched it I wanted run off and travel like she did but without having the means to do so I decided to make the most of my experiences closer to home. I was feeling like a need for change and was at the point where I wanted to find myself and figure out what and who I am. I have achieved that since watching that movie. I'm not a religious person but more of a spiritual person.... one that believes in doing good for no other reason other be a decent kind human but also I won't be controlled and pushed around either. I am also honest and really wish others would be with me too. I appreciate other people that can be honest with me. I'm not scared of the future... whatever happens will happen. I know I can handle whatever comes my way as I am a pretty strong person.
Now this past weekend coming from finally having a weekend where nothing was planned and some major rest was able to be achieved. My body is finally feeling more back to normal. Looking forward to the next couple of weekends with nothing planned for once and more rest. So I watched the movie a second time this weekend and this time watching it I realized I need to open up my heart more when it comes to possibly finding a new love. I always held back as i was tired of getting used or not being the other persons perfect person. I now know I want someone to not just say they want me but to have the actions that back it up. I want them to fight to be with me and prove they want me. I am far from perfect but I am me and I want someone to accept me for being me. I do with the other person but in the past it always felt one sided and I want someone to fight and meet me half way. Until that happens I am enjoying being on my own and making memories and living my life. Just because I am alone doesn't mean I stop living and experiencing life. In looking back this past year I have made so many awesome memories and cherish everyone that is in it.
So last weekend my son and I headed to Sun Peaks outside of Kamloops BC to complete the Spartan Beast. The whole weekend was a total blast with friends and super proud of Ty and Kristen for getting their first Trifecta. They both did amazing during the race and the 4 of us overcame a lot of challenges. Between body parts starting to fail and my rotten asthma was the worst during the race so early on that caused me so much pain during the rest of the course. Still did it way faster then last years time. Most of my Spartans I improved a lot on my times. Yvonne, Kristen, Ty and I were killing it and getting obstacles done... we make an awesome team. Glad to have that over-with but it still is one of my favorite places to race.
I am happy to report that I finished my Canadian Spartans in 18th place in my age category in the open heat... I know holly crap!!! Total shock. Right now sitting in 107th place in my age category in the Worlds Open Category. I have improved so much this year compared to my previous years. Such an awesome feeling to finish that high after not really paying attention to my stats this year. I will post a pic of my stats since I started Spartans. I accomplished all this after almost dying in March this year. A month later I embarked on this journey and never expected results like this at all. I just I am a stubborn, determined, strong and unbroken chick. lol
I never would have started Spartans if it wasn't for this good guy that I dated right after I was separated. Mike showed me what I was capable of and could achieve and introduced me to different races and experiences. We both raced a lot the time we were together and even after we broke up. He showed me that life is meant to be happy and not so negative... that there is more to life and to experience it. I have to admit I was more stubborn back then and didn't follow or use it much but as time goes on and finding my own way I have utilized that into my life now. Modified them into my own way to make them more for me. At the time I was feeling like I was being told to and it had to be that way and well I shut down. Now I realize I can take what people suggest and see if it work, if it needs to be modified or if it won't work at all.
I have a few weeks off which I am looking forward to... having free weekends... oh my what is that all about lol. Getting back into working out again, got some game plans and ready to tackle my last Spartan Beast in Seattle. Going Solo and racing solo but still looking forward to it. My friend Marcy is driving down and volunteering the day while I race and staying with me which will be fun. I am flying down since my body can't handle that long of a drive then racing the next days and driving back. Sun Peaks and 8hrs was long enough. lol I am looking forward to my little adventure. I survived Manitoba's last minute escape I can handle Seattle and one of my fav places to go visit. Next time I go there and not race and spend more time enjoying the city.
Well on that note it's time I get back to taking care of me, resting, sleeping and getting back into working out. My son is starting indoor soccer again which starts up tonight again with evaluations. Going to need some luck sent my way so I can juggle that schedule on top of a busy school sport year.
Until next time...
15 races done and about 4 more to go. I say that like no big deal. Lol I have completed three more Spartans so 7 out of 9 complete. Really looking forward to the end of them after busting my butt improving on times and overcoming more obstacles. I really gotta figure out my mindset when it comes to the multi rig and monkey bars to get through. My brain automatically tells me I can't and well I can't. Time to step up my training more and trying to overcome those ones. So with all those races and life I haven't had much time to sit down and get this blog post finished and posted.
As as I sit here on my really early morning commute into work on the train and am sitting next to a grown guy that's been eating everything under the sun but the gross part he wipes his nose on the seat beside him. I figured stuff like this happened but wanted to stay oblivious to it. Now the gross thought is in my head and I want to disinfect my body now. Lol The early morning commute has been interesting but more so the one going home. The train is an interesting setting... you see everything. Everything from the male chauvinist that pushes women and children out of the way so he can sit in a seat. I also see random acts of kindness that makes me smile and know there is still good in this crazy chaotic world. As the saying goes "be the change you wish to see in the world".
My last five races were Mud Hero in Red Deer, Calgary Spartan Sprint, new and gotta say AWESOME X-Warrior Challenge, Red Deer Spartan Super and Sprint. Mud Hero was a blast with my friend Kristen and her son. We had a great Mom/Son race and it was neat to do that with our boys. It was getting hot that day but my asthma was so awesome. I found the hills are becoming more easy and seeing small improvements is pretty cool. It was her son's first race and I have enjoyed getting to know that amazing lady and seeing her strength in her new love of this amazing sport of OCR. But then all the amazing ladies I race with blow me away at their strength and determination. The love of this sport has brought us all together and I couldn't imagine life without them all in it.
Calgary Spartan Sprint was fun with my girls. The race itself was OK... the change in the in the rules before we started and other things made for a cranky race. Western Canadian Spartans are not consistent plus I thought some of the setup was slightly dangerous. Also lack of planning and organization isn't helping them much either. They have been doing these for a few years now you think they would get better at it not worse. I have done enough of these races here and in the US to know what works and what doesn't and I rather race in the US. I have decided not to run any up here next year. Now I might with friends who haven't done many and go to help them along the way but not on a more serious level.
X-Warrior was so amazing and fun... after a disappointing race in Calgary it renewed my love of the OCR sport. Brought back my enthusiasm again. For being the first ever race it was the best race... sure a little tweaking needs to happen but to have majorly of things run smooth was awesome. Great course layout and awesome obstacles. Was even nice to run a race without mud for once. I can't believe I said that but I am a little mudded out. lol
Went up to Red Deer and completed the Spartan Super and Sprint. I gotta say I still love the location for these ones. Some things in general I don't like as they are making some obstacles more dangerous by putting them after water and mud obstacles. But over all love racing there and the course layout. The Sprint my son and his friend joined me and at the Herc hoist my son couldn't continue on due to hypothermia. He was taken off the course and put in the ambulance to warm up. He was in good hands but still scared me. I gotta say though I ran my fastest part of the race after to finish and see how he was doing. But also I was frozen and wanted to warm up myself. Happy to have had them done and had a blast with my friends as always.
Now I am onto two Spartan Beasts.... the hard ones at the end of this all. lol Heading to Sun Peaks on the 24th and then back to Seattle October 21st. First beast ever there and excited to see how they set it up. Kind of ironic that I started my races there and I finish there. I do love Seattle though so any excuse to go there I am all for it. I am going solo and will be weird to go there without my son.
In Sun Peaks I will be bringing home my double Spartan trifecta, my son will finish his first Spartan trifecta and Seattle will be my triple Spartan Trifecta. Very fitting since this is my third year doing Spartans and my last year of going hard.
Next year new goals and challenges and not racing so much. Time I get my social life back a bit and do more hiking. I won't not race as I am too addicted but am finally slowing down and letting my rest up.
So will post some race pics and write another blog post after surviving the Sun Peaks Beast.
Until next time (wish me luck lol)...
Hahaha I have had that song stuck in my head all week. It's a bit of joke at work. This new change in schedule with work I love but my sleep hasn't figured things out yet. Plus mother nature was noisy one night this week and that seems to set me back.
Race #10 was completed last Saturday and was a complete and total blast. Rugged Maniac keeps proving to making things better and this year was the best it's been. Loved the location and the setup. It was sooo much fun my son and I are signed up next year already. If you haven't you gotta register for it. Here is the Link for Rugged Maniac Calgary and you can even join our team too. We had a big group this year. I can't say enough good things about it. I love having fun with my friends on the course and not taking things so serious or rushed. Was a fun relaxing race.
This weekend heading up to Red Deer on Sunday to race at Mud Hero. This will be my 4th year there.... it's always a good time and will be for fun again. Looking forward to the road trip up with a friend and her son... our Mom/Son Race Road Trip day!! Can't wait.
The following weekend racing back in Calgary at the Spartan Sprint.... lets hope this year has much better weather then last year. It's not my favorite race site at all. But will get it done so I can get this triple spartan trifecta. My son will be at the finish handing medals out while I race then I will join him. So say HI when you see us! :)
I get a weekend off of racing but then going to the first ever stadium race in Calgary for X-Warrior. Excited to see what that is all about. Can I just say I love this stuff and so lucky to be able to be doing these things. Love living my life on my terms and making memories with my son along the way. Not only is my asthma doing much better but my body is as well. So far we are doing well together with training and listening to each other.... lets hope it holds out for my harder Spartans later on.
Until Next time...
So I did it... I actually did it. I'm not surprised I went I always knew I would go no matter what. I had the BEST solo adventure in a very long time. I was feeling the need to break out and do something crazy. Well I did it and man did I have my challenges along the way. I LOVED every minute of it even with stumbling blocks along the way. I kept my cool and knew things would work out one way or the other. The old me would panic and freak out... now I just roll with it and kept calm. I mean what else could I do... it was out of my control. lol I am so proud of myself and doing this adventure plus getting some faster race times too.
I took off from Calgary Friday night to fly into Winnipeg Manitoba. First off getting to the airport was a challenge with the downpour mother nature decided to dump on me making driving an adventure. But I get checked in and to my gate to only find out my plane is delayed. Ended up getting out of Calgary at 10pm when I was supposed to leave at 7:30. I had fun people watching and what else was I going to do. Realized before I left that the car rental place closes at midnight and I wasn't sure if I was going to have a car when I arrived in Winnipeg. Well we landed and waiting 3o min to get my bag... I walked really fast (some of you know how fast I can walk lol) and was happy to see the guy waiting for me. YAY!! I ended up getting a sweet ride... a Chrysler 300S... oh yeah I was a hot momma driving around at 1am lol. Had a good adventure getting out of Winnipeg to Steinbach... lots of interesting things happened at 1am and you would be surprised at all the animals I saw. lol FINALLY arrived at the hotel at 2am. Crashed and got three hours of sleep. Phew... I made... holly crap!
Was up and ready to race for 8:30 and had an awesome time with my friends, had my fastest Spartan Super time too and even nailed my spear throw! Was an awesome race getting some things done that I was struggling with this race season. Had a great time the rest of the day and met a lot more people too which is always awesome. I love how the Spartans are like one big family! Enjoyed hanging out with my girls too and was nice having them drop me off at the airport and hanging out with me. My plane was delayed... I know right your like really again... I know. This time I got home at 12:30am. lol little earlier then the day before. Sunday I slept a ton.... most of the day to be exact lol. I accomplished laundry and unpacking. So my last post said my son was going to head south before me.... well my little buddy wanted to stay and have one of our epic road trips together. I didn't mind and cherish these moments.. he is going to be a teen soon and that might go away. Might not be cool to hang with his Mom as much lol.
We had such a fun drive down to Columbia Falls MT and have been enjoying the rest and relaxation. Needed to recharge again. Have a busy race season when we get back and very few weekends that are free. Excited for my fun races with friends and being able to goof off and have some fun plus excited to go harder at some others. I love Montana and being down here. It's my second home and always feel content no matter what is going on in my life back home. It helps me see things more clear and feel more grounded. Time in the mountains always do that too.
Had a great time in Montana and needed to recharge. Was a nice break in the middle of my race schedule and the next two months are going to be busy but amazing ones!! Forever Grateful and Blessed!
Until next time...
I am a single mom with one son that has been living with asthma since I was 2yrs old. I also almost died three times due to severe asthma attacks! I don't let my asthma stop me from accomplishing new goals and living life to the fullest.
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