So is it normal to feel bla after having put so much training and energy into a crazy race schedule? I started triathlon training in December 2013 with my Natural High Tri Group and then race season started in March this year. I have been racing every month since then until the end of September.
I am feeling a little lost, slightly emotional at times and not sure what to do with myself. I find myself to be really lazy and put things off until I absolute need to get them done. I have no motivation or ambition but also things that normally would bother me don't (that last part isn't a bad thing). I have a bit of an I don't care whatever attitude. My head feels scattered and I find things are really hard to focus on.
I have tried to go down to my gym to workout but once I get there I just sit on my bench staring at the squat rack and end up not doing a single thing. Then head back upstairs and end up laying in bed watching TV. I haven't watched much TV all year and now I feel like I'm cramming all my missed shows in. I miss my workout mojo.... It's gone.... How do I get it back? How do I find the fun in working out again? Working out without a goal other then to maintain and stay healthy?
So maybe I'm not feeling a little lost, I'm feeling really lost. Just a person going thru the motions of life without feeling apart of it. Lots of thoughts about life going thru my head and wondering what is really going on. Maybe it's not just the lack of racing, maybe it's some hidden deep down issue that's bugging me but can't put my finger on it. I know my divorce process is taking such a long time and I keep waiting for that magic piece of paper to come to set me free... Reality is that I am already free and don't need that piece of paper to be happy. Why can't I be happy now and move on with my life. Why do I need that piece of paper to? Nothing is holding me back and I no way want to ever get back together with my ex but why am I hanging onto that notion of the paper setting me free? I am free and can choose what I want to do and be with who I want.
All I know is I need to find my working out mojo so I can get back to working out for fun. It's there somewhere I just need to dig deep and bring it back out.
Oh and I need to get those pics posted too, see another task I keep putting off.
Until next time...
I am a single mom with one son that has been living with asthma since I was 2yrs old. I also almost died three times due to severe asthma attacks! I don't let my asthma stop me from accomplishing new goals and living life to the fullest.
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